Grey Date
Earl Grey thinks it's time to get a wife. Unfortunately for Rapper, Earl Grey kidnaps Rei. Will Earl Grey marry her? Or will Rapper get her back? Characters *Earl Grey *Darla *Rapper *Rei *Katorou *Kari *Indigo *Auburn *Butlers *Blue *Gerald Butler (mentioned) *Pink (mentioned) Transcript Blue: (walks in) Hey Rapper, what's up. Rapper: Not much, go fuckers. (continues playing) Blue: Hey Pink wanted me to ask how you and Rei are doing? Rapper: Great, great. Blue: Okay, when was the last time you saw her? Rapper: Two weeks ago. Blue: Doing what? Rapper: Blowing shit up. Blue: Have you two ever, gone out on a date? Rapper: What? Blue: I said, have you two ever gone out on a date? Rapper: Dates are for pussies. Blue: But that's the only way to move your relationship to the next level? I mean do you even love her? Rapper: OF COURSE I do! Blue: JUST ask her out and you'll be fine! Rapper: (grumbles) Fine! (meanwhile. Rei is preparing to go out bullying with the others.) Rei: Alright… Should I bring the gloves or the brass knuckles…? (Rei hears her phone ring, and goes to pick it up) Rei: Sup? Question; are you Dylan? Follow up question; were you expecting Kari to answer? Rapper: Relax Rei, it's me and I was not expecting Kari to answer since I rung your cell phone. (Rei blushes while feeling embarrassed) Rei: …Oh. Rapper: SO after having a bit of a talk with Blue, I was thinking if you and I could.... uh...... go out on a date tonight? Rei: Umm, actually, I was gonna go out with Katorou & Kari for some bullying… Rapper: Well how about tomorrow? Rei: Tomorrow it is then. (later at Earl Grey's mansion) Earl Grey: Ugh! Gerald is out and I can't even think of anything evil to do! How terrifying! Every time I get my ass kicked by those pathetic Butt-Man and Loser. Darla: Perhaps you should take a break for a while. Even villains need their time to brainstorm. Earl Grey: (thinks) You know what I need Darla, someone to help me more often, someone to look out for me. Like a, (background turns into hearts sparkling) WIFE! Darla: Then go look for one. It’s not that difficult to find a woman your age, is it not? Earl Grey: BUTLERS! Listen up! WE are going to find me a wife! (butlers groan) (they fly out leaving Darla alone) Darla: (chuckles) Good. Now I have time to work on my horror story. (takes out a large kitchen knife while laughing darkly) (meanwhile, Kari helps Rei put her dress on for the date) Rei: Hey! Not too tight! Kari: Sorry. I’ve never tied a dress before. Rei: You’ve never tied your own shoes before either. (back to Rapper's house) Blue: Go get em buddy. Red: Knock the bitch dead! Rapper: Yeah whatever. (leaves) (soon they arrive at a restaurant) Rapper: Seriously? How many restaurants are they going to open in this town!? Rei: Well, there's gonna be some Restaurant Wars coming here this year. Maybe that's why. The same thing once happened in Tokyo. (as they walk inside, a butler watches them) Butler: (to speaker) Sir, I think we may have found your wife. (in the restaurant) Waiter: Could I have your order? Rei: I'll have a hamburger with bacon, lettuce, tomato, fish, cheese, onions, lots of pickles, scrambled eggs, cucumber, rice, potato, and avocado. Rapper: Nice. Me too. Waiter: Of course. (walks off) Rei: I'll have a hamburger with bacon, lettuce, tomato, fish, cheese, onions, lots of pickles, scrambled eggs, cucumber, rice, potato, and avocado. Rapper: Nice. Me too. Waiter: Of course. (waks off) Rei: AND THE BUNS BETTER BE TOASTED! Waiter: (shrieks) Yes of course! Right away! Rapper: Now that's what I call a bad girl. Just the way I like it. Rei: You know it! (later, the food comes) Waiter: Here you go people, a hamburger with bacon, lettuce, tomato, fish, cheese, onions, lots of pickles, scrambled eggs, cucumber, rice, potato, and avocado for both. And the girl's is toasted. Rei: Fuck yeah! (starts eating) (suddenly the doors and windows break with butlers running in) Rapper: The fuck!? Rei: (food in her mouth) Hmm? Earl Grey: There's my future wife! (butlers grab Rei's arms and tie her up) Rapper: REI! Rei: (muffled because of the food) The fuck?! (one of the butlers stab Rapper causing him to faint. The butlers fly out with Rei) Rei: (swallows) Okay! What's this shit about? ! (Earl Grey places a bag on Rei) (later, Auburn & Indigo scan the destroyed resteraunt) Indigo: (gently shakes Rapper's body) Rapper? Are you okay? Rapper: (slowly groaning) I- Indigo? What..... happened? Auburn: The restaurant has been destroyed. Everyone else left. Rapper: All I remember, Rei... Butlers.... Earl... Grey- (faints) Auburn: ...Huh? Indigo: (thinking) Earl Grey? Gerry's boss? (Rapper slowly wakes up) Auburn: So...what are you talking about? Rapper: I went on a date with my girlfriend Rei but then Earl Grey and his butlers kidnapped her! (suddenly cuts to the bag being bulled of Rei, who is tied up in a chair) Rei: Great! (speaking to herself) Missing Katorou & Kari NOW, aren't you Rei? ...Shut up Rei. Earl Grey: See Darla? She's the perfect girl for me. Darla: (not impressed) …Early, she’s sixteen. Gerald Butler: And how on earth did you find that shit out? Darla: Well, I somewhat know her. (floats over to Rei) You. You’re Rei Kagerou right? Rei: Yes! How the fuck do YOU know?! Darla: Oh, Midnight Blaze’s girlfriend has said a lot about you. Rei: What?! FUCKING KARI! Earl Grey: Well who cares how young she is! (to fourth wall) It's Dick Figures. Shit happens. (to Rei) Anyways, you are going to be my wife! Rei: Sorry, but no, foul breath! I have a fucking boyfriend and a douchebag who likes me! Earl Grey: Then we shall kill both of them! So you'll be with me! Besides, why the fuck would you be dating a 24 year old!? Darla: Why the fuck would SHE want to marry someone in his 40-50s?! (to the 4th wall) Men; go fig. Earl Grey: (to Darla) SILENCE!!! (to Rei) YOU WILL MARRY ME OR ELSE!!! (pulls out his blade) (Rei starts to shake in fear) Darla: You know, she's not going to cooperate if you scare her like that. Earl Grey: (growls) Very well. I shall treat her nicely. (back with Rapper, now with Katorou & Kari) Rapper: NO JOKE! Rei was kidnapped by that fucking old douche! Kari: (gasps) Oh no! Katorou: Fucking old douche? What old douche? We're not familiar with everyone in this country, you know. Rapper: Look just follow me and we'll find her. (back with Earl Grey and Rei) Earl Grey: Is there anything I could do for you Rei? (Rei raises an eyebrow, then starts to think.) Rei: Well...I would like a hamburger with bacon, lettuce, tomato, fish, cheese, onions, pickles, cucumber, rice, seaweed, chicken, carrots, ketchup, mustard, and avocado...with toasted buns. (grins) Earl Grey: What? Rei: (pissed) Is there a fucking problem? Katorou: So, what the hell does this guy want with Rei? Rapper: I have no idea. We'll find out when we find Rei. (the siren goes off) Rapper: Looks like we got some fightin' (proceeds to kill butlers) Kari: Ow! My ears! (Rapper takes out most butlers and kicks one up to the ceiling, crashing through the ceiling and landing on Rei's floor) Earl Grey: What in tarnation!? Kari: (peeks through the hole) Does anyone have any ear plugs? Katorou: Rei! Rei: Oh what luck. More actors that I know of. (suddenly Katorou & Kari are pulled back by butlers. One of them kicks Katorou in the stomach while another puts Kari in a torture chamber) Kari: Ooh! Pretty red decorations in here. Rei: I know. It's stupid, isn't it? At least I get some respect around here. (eats her burger) Earl Grey: If you want to win her back, you must defeat me! (Darla suddenly grows worried.) (Rapper & Earl Grey begin fighting with swords) Earl Grey: You can't kill me! Rapper: I wish I could! NO ONE MESSES WITH MY GIRL! Rei: This movie just got better. (Darla is shaking in fear.) (Rapper & Earl Grey repeatedly slash swords until later when Earl Grey flies over Rapper, stabbing him in the back) Rapper: (cuts Earl's legs off) HAH! Now you can't fly! Darla: (whispering) No, no, no... Rei: Woo-hoo-! (almost chokes on her burger) ...I'm okay. Rapper: I, (gets up) WIN! (prepares to kill Earl Grey) Darla: NO! (teleports in between them) Rapper: What? Darla: (shaking) P-Please...d-.....don't... Rapper: Don't do what? Kill Earl? Rei: Something tells me that's exactly what she's trying to say. Rapper: (puts sword away) Alright.... I won't. Earl Grey: D- Darla? (Darla takes a few breathes, then slowly starts to chuckle.) (Suddenly Darla punches herself.) Darla: (whispering to herself(?) What the bloody hell are you doing? He decided not to kill him! I can't let you out just yet! Rapper: I'll just take Rei and go. Earl Grey: But I just wanted a wife! Darla: (growls) W-Would it kill you to just wait?! Earl Grey: Ugh! Fine! Just take your girl and leave! (Rapper unties Rei) Rei: Well, it was fun while it lasted. (Rapper pulls Kari out from the torture chamber while Rei carries an unconscious Katorou) Kari: The decorations in there were nice! Someone should host a Halloween party in there. (they walk out of the mansion) Rapper: Eesh, what was with that blue girl? It's like she liked Earl Grey. Rei: Well, isn't she his daughter or something? Earl Grey: (from the mansion) SHE'S NOT MY DAUGHTER!! Darla: (sighs) I should probably go. Besides... (takes out a knife and sheets of paper) I have a Halloween story to become real. (walks off giggling) '''(END) '''What do you think about this episode? Terrible, I hated it. (1/5) It was okay, I guess. (2/5) Good, but not great. (3/5) Now this is cool! (4/5) THIS IS AN AWESOME EPISODE!! (5/5) Category:Episodes Category:October Releases